It didn't help watching this video from Every mother Counts.
Huffington Post, I went to the web site to find out how I can help. This years campaign was calling for a ‘no mothers day’. No letters, phone calls, emails or gifts during mothers day so that family and friends can feel what is like not to have am other. As much as I wanted to participate in the campaign, I just couldn’t. I know what it’s been like to live without a mother and didn't want to subject my family to that.
Mass was planned for Saturday and the words I heard in anger were ‘why do we have to go’, ‘I have going’! After asking to find us a seat, as we entered the church, all I heard was: "why do I have to’, ‘I don’t feel like it’! Finding a seat and then kneeling in prayer I prayed for kind words and wisdom to forgive their hormonal outburst. Sitting down I opened up the bulleting and came upon this poem.
There are times when only a mother’s love
Can understand our tears,
Can soothe our disappointments
And calm all of our fears. There are times when only a mothers faith
Can help us on life’s way
An inspire in us the confidence
We need from day to day.
For a mother’s heart and a mother’s faith
And a mothers steadfast love
Were fashioned by the angels
And sent from God above.
Michael O. AdesamyaTears filled my eyes, longing for what I never had. I’m lucky, yes, I did have six years worth of love, but I wanted more, needed and still need more! I prayed for the loss of my mother, guidance on how to truly mother those girls in the way HE needs me to mother them, for thanksgiving of all that I do have, and that I can give my girls the kind of love described in the poem!. Leaving mass I felt better, but was ready to call off mother’s day. Did I? Come back tomorrow!